Rest in Peace, Dance in Joy
Yesterday was All Saints’ Day, a somber but meaningful day for those around us who have lost loved ones over the course of the past year. I have always appreciated All Saints’ Day and the churches that take time to observe and remember.
There is something moving about hearing the names of loved ones read, hearing the toll of a bell, and lighting a candle. When we light candles in worship, they often represent the presence of Christ among us. When we hear bells rung, they are often a reminder to pause and remember.
The book of Revelation is a book filled with powerful imagery and lots of confusing things at times. But in chapter 21, we read about a vision of a new world. The writer says this in verse 4: “God will be with them; God will wipe every tear from their eyes. Death will be no more; mourning and crying and pain will be no more…”
One of the greatest privileges I have as a pastor is getting the opportunity to officiate and participate in funerals. The times I have spent at funeral homes and in living rooms and at gravesides are some of the most “holy ground” moments I have ever gotten to experience. The opportunity to hear about the lives that people have lived and the ways they have changed those around them are some of the most sacred spaces I have been invited into.
One of the important balances (in my mind) to find during a funeral service is to make space for folx to grieve the one they have lost, but also to celebrate the person they were and the life they lived. This is one of the reasons why I tend to refer to memorial services or funerals as “celebrations of life.” It’s not to gloss over the fact that there is now a hole in the lives of the people who are saying goodbye to their loved one; it’s not to skip past the sadness and to force people to move on; rather it is to provide an opportunity for folx to grieve through thanks and celebration for the person they have lost.
When I lived in Richmond, VA, a good friend of mine introduced me to the band “Delta Rae.” This indie rock band has some of my favorite songs, but I think my #1 favorite from them is called “Dance in the Graveyards.” The lyrics are below, but my favorite the chorus contains my favorite lines: When I die, I don’t want to rest in peace, I want to dance in joy, I want to dance in the graveyards, and while I’m alive, I don’t want to be alone mourning the ones who came before, I want to dance with them some more, let’s dance in the graveyards.
For me, these words are a beautiful visual of how we can celebrate those we have lost in our lives. Yes, we need to take time for grieving and mourning. But we can also honor their memories by living our lives in a way that honors them. And we can live our lives in a way that makes those we love want to do the same when we are gone.
Live your life in a way that when you die, you are dancing in joy, so that those you love will do the same. And as you are remembering and mourning those you have lost, do so in a way that finds the balance between grief and celebration- whichever approach you need in those moments when grief comes out of nowhere and you are reminded of the lives of those you love.
As we come to the end of our devotion, I invite you to take a few moments to watch and/or listen to the song “Dance in the Graveyards.” And then take some time to journal or reflect on the ones who have gone before us and the ways that you will continue to celebrate and honor their lives on this day, and every day.
Reverend Kristen Koger has served as the Pastor for Children and Families at FBC Decatur since June 2017. Kristen loves working with the youngest of God’s family as she helps them realize that they have some of the most important gifts to offer the family of God. In her free time, she enjoys hanging out with her dog Dietrich “Bonehoeffer,” cooking, knitting, and playing board games.